Love Prevails…

I just spent quite a bit of time this past week down in middle Georgia. You see, someone very significant in my life, but especially Nirish’s life, just crossed over. It was no surprise, as he had been sick for quite some time now; however, I don’t think anyone is ever truly ready to say goodbye. I did notice a few things that occurred, and I would like to share some of those with you today.

The biggest thing that I noticed was “love prevailed,” even in the height of all the family dramas and dysfunctions that had taken place over the years. I have only known this family for the past seven years, but have heard stories from decades gone by.

Their family was not much different than any other family; they were just a little more open about their dramas, which made the drama appear to be more dramatic. I don’t want to get into details, but I do want you to trust me when I say they were dramatically dysfunctional at times. Even through decades and generations of that, they stuck together, supported each other, and had the sense to withdraw their participation when things just got too out of hand. However, through this process of watching their brother, uncle cross over, they expressed their love for each other.

I honestly have never seen so much love being expressed. Sure, the drama did continue, but love was the prominent aspect. They were able to set aside their dramas and differences long enough to respect life and death!

Jeff, my friend that crossed over, was gay. I know that fact is irrelevant to many, but it is also the stumbling block for many. You see, even in the ‘backwoods south Georgia’ culture, they were all able to look beyond that and be with him. He had come out a couple of decades ago, and I have heard stories about the adjustments that they all went through; but the main point is, they got through it and had a couple of decades to just really be with their brother. Once again, love prevailed! They were all able to look beyond the packaging, and were able to enjoy the present inside. Because of this, they were able to open their family to Nirish and were able to share in the life that Nirish and he had together. Nirish and he were together for ten years, but like a lot of couples, their time together morphed and changed. The family was able to see that Nirish and Jeff continued to love each other, even though they were no longer able to be a couple. Then I came into the picture, and I am sure that it was odd to have the ex-boyfriend and his new partner come around. I could watch their minds be confused as they did not have a filing system for me, but once again “love prevailed.”

I believe that if more families were to be able to do what this family has done for years, and continue to do, life would be better for many. They laughed a lot, they were ‘full-on’ with their emotions, they cried together, and they were passionate about most things. They did not sweep things under the rugs; they brought the shit out on the front porch for everyone to see the dysfunctions. And once again, “love prevailed.” Even in the face of judgments, they understood that people that live in glass houses should not throw stones. They threw punches at each other from time to time, but no stones; they were authentic in their angers that occurred; but again, “love prevailed!”

I don’t know any family that does not have drama and dysfunction. As this family showed to anyone looking, it doesn’t matter what the dramas and dysfunctions are. If you take a moment to look deeper than that, you can find the love in any situation. Each family has a story. No family exists without one. However, the real story of any family is the love that is expressed and prevails over all the other stories and even through the punches and the dramas that create our family stories.

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